The stereotypical moody teenager is a reality as most parents up and down the country will attest to, not only can they be in foul moods they can also suffer from a serious lack of motivation to do anything but sleep. There is some scientific evidence behind this too, with many experts citing these mood changes as a result of their changing brain chemistry. Many parents will worry about their child’s future or lack of during these periods but there are ways you can motivate them and encourage them to perform well in school.
There is no easy solution that will change your child into a motivated young person determined to succeed, because you can’t make someone care about something that they simply couldn’t care less about. Instead, you need to offer rewards that they value as a motivating factor. They want to go to a concert this weekend well that’s fine but say they can only go if they complete their homework or finish college/university applications. But you actually have to follow up on this instruction otherwise you will appear to be a soft touch which will only make them challenge you more.
Another way to motivate them is to allow them to make their own choices even if this means skipping homework, it will make you anxious but they will have to face the consequences for their own decision. Nothing quite makes them change their behaviour like punishment from school or extra work to make up for what they choose to skip over. Fairly quickly they will start to make better decisions about what they want to do and how they should be spending their time. This also means that they will be more motivated because they are aware of what will happen if they don’t get on top of the responsibilities that they have.
You shouldn’t try and appear to be motivating them instead you should aim to inspire them to achieve. Being controlling by screaming and shouting at them will not work, you need to ask yourself if the behaviour you show your child is overly controlling. It is difficult to understand what an inspiring behaviour is but the best way to achieve it is think about someone who has inspired you and model your behaviour around theirs. Chances are if it inspired you it will have a similar effect on your moody teen.
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